Over the last couple of years, I have had many moments of big, HUGE epiphanies. (Hence, Finding Epiphany). One of them was my daddy issues. Every time a client walked away or I failed to achieve for them (outside factors didn't seem to matter) I immediately thought "my father will be so disappointed in me." See, I don't know how they did it, but my parents raised my sisters and I to be well educated, strong, independent and entirely too modest for our own good. It has always been difficult for me to accept praise and to celebrate my achievements because there was such little emphasis put on success. On top of it, the fear of disappointing my father was instilled early on and it was, for a lifetime, the ultimate judgement on everything accomplished.
As I grew older I realized that instead of taking a moment to celebrate my accomplishments in work and for clients, I just shoved the elation under the rug, shrugging it off like "no big deal" and quickly moving on to the next thing. One girlfriend finally said "E, it's amazing what you just accomplished for your client. You should be elated!" "I know, but I just can't. This is what I do. It's no big deal and I need to focus on the next big get for them." "E, I really don't think you get it. It's not being egotistical to tout and celebrate your accomplishments. You aren't bragging. We all want to celebrate you, as your friends. This is a big deal. Take a moment, accept it and revel in it." She was SO right and ever since then I put more weight on the things I'm able to accomplish and do a little happy dance when I've scored for a client. I've come to realize that, yes, this is what I do day in and day out, but it's still major and I need to celebrate it!