Stress - All Time High

Ugh...after spending nearly $500 of my own money, which I didn't have to give away, on the new business pitch trip to Pittsburgh, we find out today we didn't win.  Seriously?  How do we go from leading the pack to not winning?  It's all sssooo confusing.

I will admit that recently I've been feeling as if my young looks are going against me.  God bless my parents and the awesome genetics they handed down to their offspring, but I'm beginning to feel that gaining another 20 pounds, cutting my hair, dying it a blah brown and dressing in old woman suits would make me seem more credible in the eyes of prospective clients. I'm not kidding.  I just don't get it.

Over the years I've realized that I actually have to be a different person, professionally, with each one of my clients.  Mostly it's with men.  The women are great and love to bond on a level beyond professional, it's the men who make me feel like Cybil.

There are the men who:

• are passive aggressive and like having a strong, bitchy woman push them around, telling them how it's going to be.
• ignore me until I've been in the board room yapping long enough that they actually begin to listen to what I have to say.  Then they totally respect me. 
• look at me in disbelief that I have 15 years experience, knowledge and creative ideas that will benefit them.  Mostly I feel they think I can't get it done.
• are cool and want me to be cool like "one of the guys", so I talk to them like one of the guys, never touching on anything too personal
• and those who want to totally and completely be "all up in my biznez", literally.  Of course I don't make it a practice to date my clients, especially when they're near dead, ask me out for drinks and then attempt to make out with me.  Eeeewww!

I'm telling you, it SUCKS!  Unfortunately, once again, I feel that this is potentially what might have occurred in this instance.  It's not the first time I've been on a pitch with this company and actually had feedback to this point.  They totally question my capabilities.  Oddly enough, when I search online later to see how things are going for them, I see nothing.  NOTHING!

The worst part is that I needed a return on my investment...I did NOT have that $500 to spend and my stress is now at an all time high.

Am I off spiritually?  Am I disconnected?  Have I been so deep in la-la land with Steven that I've simply not focused where I should?  A friend told me today that I needed the break.  I needed to mentally and spiritually get away from it all, but now I'm just left feeling like I may not accomplish what it is I want to...that the opportunities in front of me are all for not.  Certainly God wouldn't have given me more than I can handle - I do believe everything happens for a reason, but this is nuts!

How is it after everything good that's happened that I am here....once again?


xoxo

Christmas Ideas Numero... I Don't Even Know. Call It IV, V and VI

I am constantly amazed of what I find around my house.  I may not have spent any money, but two dollars (thanks to The Dollar Store) on wrapping but some how I churned out the cutest little packages tonight.  I'm absolutely beside myself.  Yes, even if I am a creative person.  It's just that I don't get a chance to sit down and make anything anymore.  Tonight cured that....for awhile.

Some more affordable gift tips:
1. Instead of buying labels - make them or print them
A couple of years ago I started taking old holiday cards, cutting out a graphic and then writing the person's name on the back.  Can be very cute (especially with all the fun cards out there today) and simple if the gift is wrapped in several sheets of tissue paper - another one of my ideas for you.

Of course, if you don't have them around then go to a site like Free Printable Gift Tags or About.com for very cute and traditional gift tags you can create with any color printer.

2. If you're the creative type like me, then you have some random stuff in your "craft bin" - yes, I have a craft bin.  It's small.  Shutup! You can heckle at my craft bin but don't you dare make fun of my glue gun.  It's brought happiness to loads of people! - I dug out scraps of fabric and tons of ribbons which became pretty much the cutest gifts I've ever wrapped, if I do say so myself - and that's after working in high school doing gift wrap at a department store!  Sure it took a little bit more time and the "wrapping" will be tossed, but the detail and love won't be forgotten.

3. So I burned CDs for Brother-in-law1.  Well, for the gals and gay boyfriend I printed pictures and actually, believe it or not, got the cutest frames at.....The Dollar Store.  No kidding.

Running tab of what I've spent thus far on Christmas gifts for family and four friends (drum roll).....roughly $12.  Yep, and just about everyone is taken care of.  Next is some postage but I think I will easily spend 1/3 of what I have in years past and it will still be a joyful, generous and surprising holiday for all.  Gosh, who knows how I'll be able to top this next year....Ideas?  LOL

xoxo

Money-Saving Tip 1: Don't Shop Again

A few years ago I was invited to an interesting afternoon party at a friend's condo. They called it a clothing swap and let me tell you it was a fucking GOLDMINE! Seriously, my friends have expensive and great taste and I have totally scored! The one I went to recently included several pairs of designer (and I mean $400) shoes. Since then, a couple of other groups have popped up and I've, fortunately, secured invitations to those as well.

I love, LOVE the clothing swap concept, especially because I can get rid of my stuff. They say, one woman's trash is another's treasure. Over the last two years, I've landed some amazing things, especially dresses with the tags still on. It's amazing what we women will buy and decide you'll never wear it after it's too late to return, so why not allow another fabulous woman the chance to have it? And, let's be honest, we all keep clothing one size smaller and bigger, for the "ups and downs", but some things you'll just never get into again. Time to say adios!

The trick about the clothing swap is not just to take anything you like, you've got to try it on, allow the other women to say "Yes! that fits you perfectly. You should definitely take that" and some of them will whimper with some jealousy that they didn't find it first. It's all about strategy.

1. Get to the party a little early
2. While you set out your stuff, scope what's already present - some times, the host will let you pick things up early since you were nice enough to come early and help set up
3. Grab a glass of wine and stay nearby to watch what other's lay out - this can include trying on shoes to see if they fit
4. Make a mental note of what you want and need most to fill out your closet
5. When they say "Go!" head directly for what you want, do not pass Go, just grab
6. The second time through begin looking through everything more carefully - is it in your size, is it your style, is it something you really need
7. Try on - make sure it fits before you walk out with two trashbags of clothing you might end up dumping off at the Salvation Army any way
8. While trying on, scope out what others are trying on. If it doesn't fit them, politely ask if you can try it on. If it fits, it's yours.
9. Be sociable and complimentary. While you're on a serious mission, it's important to connect with the other women. Besides, there's nothing better than the honest opinion of these gals. They are the LEAST likely to tell you something looks good if it doesn't and then you hand it over to them.
10. Place your treasures in your bag and go back for additional rounds until you feel you've gotten everything worthwhile. This is also a great time to think of other women in your life. Is there something here that a friend would like, a sister? Gift shopping made easy and FREE!
11. Don't leave immediately. Stay and mingle. Tell the gals how great they look in their new findings and....make some friends.
12. Help the host pack up the remaining items to be sent to a charity. We typically drop off at Dress for Success or a women's shelter. Good for you, good for the community.

In the last two years, I've scored 12 dresses, 14 tops, 10 pairs of pants/jeans, 3 skirts, five pairs of shoes, five handbags, and tons of jewelry. The only money I've spent shopping this year was at Old Navy for white T's and some tank tops. That's not even $40!

If you can't find one, start one. It's the best afternoon with your girlfriends you will ever spend. And, if there's a man in your life, often women will bring things from their guy's closet. I've also heard, gasp, that some men are getting in on the swap. Suits are expensive and who doesn't want to save some dough in this recession?